January 20, 2008

Why Freshmen Girls Shouldn't Date Upper Classmen

Before getting into a relationship with an upper classmen guy while you are a freshmen you should reconsider. You are just going to get hurt and ruin your social standings. I guarantee each of the things will be true if you date an upper class man.

He won't admit to his friends you are dating. His friends will tease him and tell him he is desperate to get some action. In high school dating someone older is always seen as "cool". Dating someone younger is just an embarrassment and an act of desperation to get some easy sex. A senior friend of mine was dating a freshman girl and when he was asked by some of his friends about it he denied the relationship. Whenever, he was around the freshman in public he refused to acknowledge her as his girlfriend. His friends would call her "the whore" and he wouldn't stand up for her, because she didn't mean anything to him.

Your journey into high school is just beginning while his is ending. As a Junior or Senior he is getting ready for college in the real world. In a few years he will be leaving and if you stay together that long (not likely) he will break your heart. As a freshman you are just getting used to high school and a bit awkward about it. He has been there for three or four years and can't wait to get out of there. You are on two completely different levels.

He will expect you to go farther sexually. Most likely he had a relationship before and has had sex. He will expect you to do it with him, because "all his other girlfriends have." You are excited about having a senior boyfriend so you give into his desires, because you don't want to lose him. You don't realize the only reason he is going out with you is for sex. And soon he will probably get bored of you and move on. On top of that you will be labeled as a whore and easy.

The Bottomline: Date a fellow freshman. It's not worth the pain you will experience.

82 comments:

C-Squared said...

I've always thought it was creepy, seeing Freshman Girls with Senior Boys. It's almost like pedophilia, the difference in maturity is so huge.

Selene said...

I agree c-sqaured, it isn't fair for the girl because she is being taken advantage of by a more mature person. At the same time I pity them even though they are happy with their choice.

Mike Stoute said...

As a guy, I feel this is a great post for girls to read. I am 50/50 on the subject of it though. Girls sometimes pair well with older guys and vice versa. I think your post applies to the majority, but as we all know there are some exceptions to the rule ;)

Selene said...

There is always exceptions to every rule, but I agree it applies to the majority. An example of an exception of the rule would be a freshman girl who got held back. She is a freshman twice, so she is more mature than the other freshmen.

Anonymous said...

I agree. I see it all the time... I have also seen some girls get pregnant from these types of things and the guy disown her.

Its sad really

Anonymous said...

This is bull, what hot girl has time for a blog. Girls are somewhere from 2-4 years more mature than boys, physically and mentally, right here I wrote like 3 paragraphs earlier, so anyways no its just natural. 14(freshman age) + 3(average of maturity)= 17 Junior+Senior Age. I am going into Senior year and I had no chance with the girls in my grade the first couple years, now I can get some of them or a hot freshman or sophemore. Ugly girls arent as physically mature so this maybe observations from an unpopular little prude. But I know as a freshman I had friends that were girls with D cups, and I had 0 pecs.

Anonymous said...

hmm.... im going to be a sophmore and i know alot of my friends last year that dated jrs. and seniors.... some of them were good relationships while the other girls lost sight of good decent values. i think this blog is a well written insight of how highschool really is. i printed it out and showed it to my youthpaster. and the last poster was a jerk. any guy that sits and writes about things at 1 in the moring has issues with himself.

keep up the blogging =]]]

Anonymous said...

Im pretty such thats stereotyping senior guys. Sure there is a somewhat large percentage of guys that will do that but i know for a fact i wouldn't.
And i agree with the more mature age in girls, not that all freshman girls should date senior guys, but if they think its right then they should go for it.

Anonymous said...

I'm a freshmen girl dating a senior guy. =) I started dating him when I was in 7th grade and he was in 10th. Yes, there is sex involved but that happened for the first time just this year. we have been dating for 2 years.

Anonymous said...

I have a little disagreement with this blog. Your stereotyping the seniors like they're ALL gonna be jerks and gonna do that to a freshman girl. It sounds to me like your a little bitter and arent looking at this objectively enough for people to get the full scope of the situation. It depends on A) the culture of the school B) the actual senior C) wether or not his friends are actual friends and would back off of his girlfriend

The whole "won't admit" thing only applies if the guy is a huge jerk and if he isnt secure with the fact shes younger than he shouldnt have started the relationship in the first place.

I agree with the maturity concept and the "Journey" beginning while his is ending.

ITS NOT ALL ABOUT SEX! Its stereotypes like this that pressure teens to have sex in the first place. People just need to chill out on the whole subject. It all depends on the guy, if hes mature enough not to succumb to social pressures, and once again if hes a jerk. You could find this out easily by asking around to see if he fits the "dine and ditch" motif.

BOTTOM LINE: You should date because you have fun spending time with one another, and you dont feel any pressure from him. NOT ALL Seniors are gonna be jerks to you and do all this.. IDK what you have against these relationships personally but you sound like you just had a bad expierience and your trying to stop good relationships before they start. I've seen great relationships come from a Senior-Freshman relationship. They often never continue after graduation but I always say live life in the now and dont worry about the future, ANY relationship will have heartbreak just this one might have an actual date, start of college semester

Charlie Scene said...

Your probably ugly..point blank dude, i'll give you moderately attractive, but if a dude doesnt acknowledge hes in a relationship with you its one of two things:

A)You really ARE a whore and his friends say it because hes said it about you it wasnt suppose to be a relationship YOU just thought it was. THATS why he doesnt defend you!

B)He isnt comfortable with the relationship because he doesnt like you that much

thats probably why he didnt acknowledge the relationship

dude, MOST seniors are pretty much mature enough to not care what others think i mean i know its highschool but obviously your blogging about "getting through it" and are ignoring the fact that you havent already DONE it!

I would like to think as a Senior that people may talk about you behind your back and say opinions about your relationship, but you know that if you like a chick and genuinely enjoy being with her than it doesnt matter what people say.

This is an opinion of what happened to ONE girl its unfortunate that you were one of the girls who were taken advantage of but don't bash something you never actually had in the first place: A RELATIONSHIP WITH A SENIOR.

For Girls: Go out with him because you like to spend time with him and your comfortable and you feel no pressure (I'm talking from HIM) obviously your gonna put pressure on yourself because of the difference, but just forget all that and just have a good time. Look for warning signs he's not a good guy 1) always pressures you 2) tries to play games when he doesnt get what he wants ( ex. ignoring you, threatening to dump you, etc.) 3)If he doesnt really acknowledge you in public is a major one

For Guys: Fuck what everyone else thinks dude! if you like her, you have fun spending time with her, and shes a close enough match in maturity where she isnt past your tolerance in the annoying department then go for it and try and see what happens. You never know till you try. Plus, if your "friends" have a problem with it then screw them they dont respect you enough or dont understand what its actually like to have genuine feelings for a girl, if they've had real relationships regardless of age then they'll understand. Other people can talk all they want just remember that your having more fun chilling with your girlfriend then they are sitting there hating on your relationship.

Anonymous said...

This is a ridiculous assumption, it may be the case in certain instances but not the majority from my experience.

I am a senior, and I dated both older and younger girls all through my sophmore and junior year. I'm now dating a senior, but i have a fellow senior friend dating a freshman. he's not embarrassed by her, we respect her, and he accepts her as his girlfriend.

dont make such solid statements when you havent researched thoroughly. this is not to say that there are a couple guys who are creeps, but the majority of my fellow classmates (guys and girls) dating underclassmen arent such scum bags as you describe

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Lindsayy. said...

well i am dating a senior right now, and i really dont see the problem with it. I think all relationships are the same. And even guys who are in the same class "use" girls just to "have fun." i have been through that in a relation ship i had with a guy who was the same age as me. and now im dating a senior who is more mature and cares about me. The only thing that i am scared about is when he graduates. Love has no age limit.

I hope some of you get the picture to what i am saying.

Lindsayy. said...

I agree with "Charlie Scene."

Lindsayy.Again lol said...

I DEFINITELY AGREE WITH ANONYMOUS (2 ABOVE MY COMMENT!)

your totally right, and thats exactly what im going through, i have lots of senior friends and my boyfriends friends (who is a senior) respects me.

Alissa Rose said...

I know back when I was a Freshman, I saw many Freshman girls get used by senior guys... I would see them crying in the bathroom as I listened to their story while in the stalls... year after year. But now, this year as a Senior, at my school people really look down on Seniors Dating Freshman. And I see alot of the Freshman with the Seniors act like TOTAL whores, and the girls are all over them and making out with the guys as if they were about to head crazily to a room. I don't understand it, but just today I saw a guy my age (senior) slap a Freshman girl, his girlfriend, on the butt. I would definately say that Senior guys dating Freshman girls is indeed a booty call, especially if they're the ones who are always talking about sex all the time.

Another thing... I have a friend who is my age too, and he is dating a freshman. He is indeed embarrassed of her and has said he was afraid to break up w/ her because he had a dream she would go nuts. I talked to him once before and he was indeed talking about sex, and trying to get really close to me in a bad way w/ his hand.

I know, as a Senior, I'd NEVER go out w/ a Freshman guy. From my point of view, it's creepy, and they still look like babies. I don't see why guys don't see the Freshman girls that way... but then again, I don't think those boys who get all gross like that have learned how to respect woman... or themselves... or the big age difference...

so... Freshman girls... put your head on instead of letting infatuation get to you.... if they say they love you and it's been a short time, they just wanna get in your pants.. if they are deciding wheither they do love you and it's in a shy innocent way, and he's not pressuring you into anything, then... maybe he actually does love you.

I've also heard the term of where the guy goes "it's up to you," for anything. That's just their excuse for the girl to give THEM what they want. They might not even pressure you. But you might pressure yourself... just like how the other posts say...

Be smart, girls!

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Anonymous said...

im a freshman girl, i liked a senior, it ended really badly and i still miss him though, i dont know y i miss him... he was a nice guy though, and he did say to his friends that i was his girlfriend, but not all freshman/senior relationships are bad, and he didnt pressure me with anything either.

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